Applying Myself

I'm applying for jobs, but you already knew that. The call centre that I haven't been back to since my first day keep emailing me, once for my bank details (legit) and now an 'induction kit', so it's clear my absence has been noticed.

On the application front I applied for a job at Jucy Rentals, I didn't get the job, I know because I have already received an email saying so. The application process consisted of an over the top survey that took ages, but the questions allowed me to find out a little about myself. For example, if there is a stripper at a birthday party I will get a front row seat, my favourite type of dog is one that is mischievous and makes me laugh plus I wouldn't comment on the state of your room, because I'm not your mother.

I also have a bit more information about the mysterious textile company. They're based in Ontario, Canada and it's probably a scam...

Our company Lincoln Fabrics&Textile®, is a
company based in St Catherine Ontario Canada, and we are specialist in
textile and fabric materials.We have volunteer to give out training to
all our newly employee staff,We need regional representatives to help
dispatch service in terms of Account Payable and Receivable to our
customers in the United Kingdom,United State,Australia,New Zealand and
within Canada whom will be in charge of payment/document from our
clients/customers in your locality. Most of our customers pay
through,Cheques,Email Money Transfer(Interac) and Credit Card
Transfer.This brings our quest to employ credible and trustworthy
individuals as our representatives to handle our transactions/Funds.

There's the opening paragraph of their email, all I could read was 'scam scam scam scam scam engrish scam scam'. I think I first realised it was a scam when they said 'We have volunteer to give out training to all our newly employee staff,' it's English, but not as we know it, maybe they're French Canadians?

So that's a dead end, unlike my new Russian girlfriend who I haven't replied to but is already way too clingy...

"Oh God Ryan, you think I'm fat! You're saying I'm fat aren't you?! Mudak!!"

At least I have another picture of her, maybe I can put them on my iPod and brag about my new girlfriend from Russia. Maybe I should reply, but how? She wants a picture of me, of course, I should totally send her one.

Here's one of me, just hanging out.

Russian girls don't know I'm not Jason Statham, right? 

So I'm going to look at more jobs, apply for some of them and hope for the best. Or I might just think up elaborate situations and imagine how Jason Statham would handle them, like if a Russian girl emailed you because she was totally being held hostage by Vladimir Putin...

Obviously I'd be 'Putin' a bullet in his head!

YEAH!